Single to Single Mom

Do you remember when it was just you? I know some moms say they can’t remember their life before having a child(ren). Well, I do remember life before the 8am Saturday hazing, dodging small toys all over the floor or the constant wanting to be picked up. I remember going out consistently on a Friday night and literally sleeping all day Saturday. Although not meaningful at all, wasting away a productive Saturday, that was my life at the time and I loved it! I made plans on a whim with friends, I traveled when and where I wanted and dinner out every night was definitely an option.

I always thought that I would be married before I became a mother. I was raised in a two-parent home so I knew what it looked like and what to expect. I had my life all planned out – when I would get married and when I would have my first child. I just wasn’t ready in my twenties. Those years were for partying, living life and enjoying my freedom. But, when I hit my thirties, those feelings began to change. Just about everyone I knew was getting married and having babies and I was still single. There were times that I felt sad and incomplete when I would see or hear of the good news my former classmates shared on social media of them getting engaged or becoming pregnant. I wondered why it wasn’t happening for me.

But, OMG, IT happened. I was pregnant and single…nervous and excited all at the same time.

I wasn’t sure how to share the news with my family; however, I did and they were happy. And that’s when it all hit me, I’m going to be a mommy. I’m going to have responsibilities that I’ve never had before. I’m going to be responsible for a little human. I didn’t quite know how to wrap my head around it. There was so much to prepare for before her arrival. I had to change my eating habits, no more wine, no more hanging out. I had to add her to my health insurance, find a pediatrician and a daycare. The list went on and on. Once my daughter arrived, my life totally revolved around her. I was no longer on my own schedule. I was on hers and I had to adjust to her needs. I will admit, it was a little overwhelming at times. There were times when I didn’t shower for days and I went to bed without having dinner. As a single person, I never missed a shower and I definitely didn’t miss a meal. lol I went out to dinner every chance I got. I also didn’t allow anyone other than my sister to keep her while I did take a few minutes or hours for myself.

It took over a year before I felt comfortable going out again and doing things without her. Yes, she went out to dinner with my sister and I. She was our little third wheel. She’s two and half now and I totally feel okay with leaving her behind to travel for a weekend getaway. Although my life will never be the same and I have some great memories to look back on; it’s so much better and more fulfilling and rewarding now that she’s in it. And most importantly, I’m feeling back to me again.

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Thumbnail Photo - DesignLifeKids